Toronto 5k

10703940_10154588445895191_415053522590821777_nHappy Birthday to me!

First competitive run since the spring. (!)

TMI Alert: Woke up with my period, severe back cramps and diarrhea. (Really?! You’d think by 49 that would be the gift that no longer keeps on giving… Just sayin)

So, couldn’t eat or drink other than a couple of bites of raisin bread to line my stomach for the 2  Aleve I had to take for the cramps. Continue reading “Toronto 5k”

They say it’s your Birthday… Happy Birthday to ya!…

They say it’s your Birthday… You’re gonna have a good time…

“they” are / were right!

Let’s get this out of the way right now. I’m happy.
Yes, that’s right, you heard me, happy.
Unabashedly enjoying life, and all that it has to offer.

Nope, website hasn’t been hacked, nor have I been absorbed by pod people.

I just finally, after years of misery, and trying to fit my square pegged self into all of the shiny red holes everyone else thought I should be in, decided enough was enough.

I decided to be apologetically me…
And guess what? I discovered I LIKE me. Who knew!?
And so do others.
And guess what? I don’t need fixing!

Now I’m not saying I’m perfect suddenly. Noooooo… there is always room for improvement in many areas.
I’m just saying that at the core, I’m a pretty fucking awesome person, and after 49 years on the planet, I feel like I actually truly am authentically ME. Continue reading “They say it’s your Birthday… Happy Birthday to ya!…”

Another year older…

another year wiser? Hopefully…

It’s funny, every year on my birthday it’s pretty much the same routine. I plan an exquisite day for myself, with myself, by myself. Why? Because I won’t let myself down, and if I do, I will know in advance and be prepared for it.

See, when I turned 40, you know that big milestone birthday everyone either embraces or dreads? Well, no one marked it with me. No one called. No one emailed. No one posted on my facebook wall. I sat alone, in my apartment, feeling like a failure and a bad friend. (yes, I blamed myself for everyone forgetting my birthday) I still take a good portion of the blame actually. Continue reading “Another year older…”

Full Circle…

And then you look up and look around, and make a conscious shift in your attitude…
and suddenly the world seems a little less… dark.

So, I struggled with myself on the way home after work.
I knew I had to eat, but I also knew I had no food in my house.
I knew I wasn’t overly hungry, so my annual Keg dinner was out.
I knew I wanted company, but wanted ultimately to be alone.
I wanted the the comfort of a familiar place, familiar food and the company of strangers.

So I decided somewhere along the commute that I was taking myself for tapas and tequila. I hoped it would be quiet in there as it was early, and it was. I got myself a table by an electrical outlet, plugged in my computer, and started to write what was swirling around in my head (see note)

I announced to the waitress that it was my birthday (the first official out loud proclamation of said occasion on this day) and that I was treating myself to dinner out. Continue reading “Full Circle…”