“Resignation letter written. To be delivered in person on Sunday.”
My goodness, that was quite the cliffhanger no?
Why do I fall off the planet blog wise with a crazy cliffhanger like that every time?
I guess it’s because life happens so fast once you put things in motion that you really don’t have time to sit and write it all down. (that is going to change… mark my words)
So, I guess I will just go back in time and try to trace my crazy steps this past month.
Jan 16th, 2012 – I quit my job
I waited all day for the boss to come in. He was later on this day than usual (3:30ish he walked through the door) which is brutal when you have your resignation letter all typed up and on your desk. I vacillated back and forth all day between bravery and chickenshit, but in the end, I just knew for my own sanity I had to go through with it, no matter the consequences. There is never a perfect time to do something like this, and waiting for it is just another way of procrastinating and giving into the fear. I spend so much time advising everyone else to trust their guts and get out of toxic situations, and yet when it comes to my own life, I sit and wallow in some weird fear-based martyrdom.
I was so proud of myself. I calmly brought up the topic and handed him my letter of resignation. I didn’t cry. I didn’t go into too much detail. I played my cards very close to my vest, and stood my ground even when prodded for more information on the “why” this was happening. I told him there was no need to go into the gritty details as I had 4wks of work to go, and didn’t want to be sitting in a potentially very awkward work environment for the duration. He agreed reluctantly. I told him that at the end of my tenure, I would gladly go out for drinks with him and spill it all.
He admitted he knew I had been unhappy for a while, and he regretted not calling attention to it sooner so he could potentially fix things.
We came up with a game plan, and I began my Off-boarding.
It was a euphoric week. I felt like a mountain of boulders had been lifted from my shoulders. I slept like a baby for the first time in months. I smiled and laughed with ease. I felt human again. It was lovely.
Jan 25, 2012 – I got my job back. Only a better one.
A funny thing happened after I quit. The bosses started to really get their shit together. All of the things that had fallen by the wayside were all of a sudden, once again, a priority. It was invigorating. We were all invigorated. We were communicating, and working hard towards a common goal. The company was returning to it’s roots and becoming the company that I had originally been hired to work for, but had disappeared along the way.
In addition to that, part of my off-boarding was to track all of my processes, and create a sort of “how to” book for someone to take over my job virtually. Yes, I came to the realization that I had actually been tasked to create a new job. A better job. The job, it turns out, that I really wanted. But on top of that, more importantly, I also realized that my leaving at this time would derail all of the good work we were all doing, as there was no way someone could walk into my role, in 4 wks, no matter how detailed a book I handed them. A lot of my role is instinctual, especially right now as everything is still transitioning. You can’t teach a total stranger, with no history or emotional investment in the company, how to troubleshoot something on the fly, and what takes priority. Maybe down the road, when there are less things to actually troubleshoot, but not right now.
So, I rescinded my resignation. (say that ten times fast…) but with conditions, the most important of which was an “airing of grievances” on my part, on a Seinfeld Festivus level. There were a lot of things that led to my resigning in the first place, and they all had to be addressed before any future plans came into play. To his credit, the boss took it all in stride (the laundry list of “why Meesh quit”) and conceded to 90% of it. (there was a 10% push back, but that was reasonable in my opinion)
So, long story short, my original “last day” of February 15th was pushed to March 1st, when we all move out of the office, and when I will transition into my new role as a “virtual” employee. That’s right! I’ll be working from my home office kids!
Trading in my soul crushing daily commute for a zen-like telecommute. We will all be telecommuting actually. Maybe someday down the road an office will be warranted once again, but right now, it’s just an frivolous expense for a job that can be done, and is already mostly done, remotely.
The part of the transition that I am personally most excited about is that I will also be reestablished as a freelance independent contractor. Though my take home pay won’t change for the most part, my hours will be lighter, and my schedule flexible. This will allow me to take on other clients, work on other projects, do some schooling, concentrate on my writing projects, and allow for easier travel schedules.
As if to confirm that I’m doing the right thing, I’ve already had a few potential new clients reach out to me for projects. Ironically, freeing up my schedule could actually see me working twice as much. Funny how that works!
So that is where things stand at the moment. 2 more weeks in the downtown office, then the new role begins!
I’m looking forward to my 1 minute commute from the kitchen to the “home office”.
(I’ll be hitting Ikea this week to transform my current workspace into something more functional)
The saddest part is that I will have to say goodbye to my Starbucks peeps. 😦 But I have promised to come visit them when I’m in the hood. (no really, I’m dead serious)
I’m thinking I will still go for a “bucks” in the morning. Someone suggested that I get up, get dressed and go for a walk in the morning before starting work, to put me in that “work” frame of mind, which I think is a great idea. It’s about a 20min walk from my apt to the Starbucks on Danforth, that gives me a nice 40min wake up/exercise routine (which I may eventually do without grabbing a coffee… but lets start with baby steps!)
anyway… that’s all for now. Lot’s more to chat about, but I’ll split it up into some other posts this week.